“Please help me save my marriage!” Whenever a person is saying this, there’s little else they can focus on. When the most important relationship you have is coming apart before your eyes, you’re bound to feel helpless and confused. As tempting as it is to ignore the issues at hand and move forward with the belief that your love will conquer all, don’t do it. By not addressing your issues, you’re guaranteeing that eventually you’ll end up divorced from your spouse. You need to take steps right now to ensure your marriage has the fighting chance it deserves.
There’s an old saying about how talk is cheap. When it comes to saving your marriage, nothing could possibly be further from the truth. Talking is crucial to rebuilding any relationship and you and your spouse need to develop a new plan for communicating with one another. One of the main issues that married couples in crisis face is they get to a point where they can’t have a level headed, productive conversation without it escalating into an argument. Nothing in your relationship will change unless the way you talk to each other changes.
Work on developing a set of guidelines for communicating. You can set the tone by suggesting that you two set aside a block of time each day to talk uninterrupted. You also have to make it clear to your spouse that you’re there for them anytime. Promise that you’ll be more understanding and then follow through with that. You each have to make concessions and learning how to communicate more openly and honesty is one of them. Yes, it will take effort, but it’s worth it.
Embracing your spouse’s imperfections is another way you can make your marriage stronger. When a relationship begins to show signs of wear and tear, many couples fall into the pattern of focusing on the negative things about their partner. No one is perfect. If you continually only look at what you don’t like about your spouse, that will overshadow the things you love. You can retrain your brain to only focus on the things you find appealing about your spouse. Push all those negative thoughts aside. You’ll be amazed at what a difference it makes in how you feel about them. It will also set an example for your partner. Once they notice you being more accepting of them, they’ll follow suit with you. That will definitely help to get your marriage back on balanced ground.
Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was. You can save your marriage and rebuild it into a more connected, satisfying relationship.
Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can’t be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.